DEVOTION: Wrestling with God

By Leila Halawe | @LHalawe

When I became a Christian, the hardest thing for me was surrender – surrendering my life, my heart, my dreams, everything. God has a sense of humour because He has made me fiercely independent and put a control streak in me, yet He regularly asks me to hand over control to Him, and that has been hard for me. Very hard. So when God started asking me to completely depend on Him, it was foreign ground and I found myself wrestling with God instead of being still before Him. I found myself handing things over, only to try and wrestle them back from God. I hand it over, then try to wrestle it back. Hand it over, wrestle it back. I have spent many a night wrestling with God over things and to be honest, I felt bad about it for a while and felt like I wasn’t being a proper Christian, but then I stumbled across Jacob in the Old Testament and found myself feeling a little better.

In Genesis 32:22-31 we read about Jacob wrestling with God:

“That night Jacob got up and took his two wives, his two female servants and his eleven sons and crossed the ford of the Jabbok. After he had sent them across the stream, he sent over all his possessions. So Jacob was left alone, and a man wrestled with him till daybreak. When the man saw that he could not overpower him, he touched the socket of Jacob’s hip so that his hip was wrenched as he wrestled with the man. Then the man said, “let me go, for it is daybreak.” But Jacob replied, “I will not let you go unless you bless me.” The man asked him, “what is your name?” “Jacob,” he answered. Then the man said, “your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel, because you have struggled with god and with humans and have overcome.” Jacob said, “please tell me your name.” But he replied, “why do you ask my name?” Then he blessed him there. So Jacob called the place Peniel, saying, “it is because I saw god face to face, and yet my life was spared.”. The sun rose above him as he passed Peniel, and he was limping because of his hip.”

When I read about Jacob, I found myself identifying with his situation. As I said, I’ve wrestled with God often and at times have kept wrestling when I should have thrown in the towel long ago (that would be that stubbornness that I mentioned earlier.) But there were a couple of things that really stood out for me when reading Jacob’s encounter. Firstly, Jacob was stubborn. As in, really stubborn. As in, even an out of joint hip didn’t stop him from wrestling with God. I have been, on many on occasion, called a stubborn mule, and with good reason; I can be exceptionally stubborn and when I dig my heels in on something, it takes a lot to shift me. Which can be good and bad. Good in some instances, bad in others, especially when it comes to being stubborn with God because as much as I like to think I know better, to date, God’s ways and plans have always better than mine. But it’s God’s response to Jacob’s stubbornness that really intrigues me.

When the man saw that he could not overpower him, he touched the socket of Jacob’s hip so that his hip was wrenched as he wrestled with the man. (Gen 32:25)

While this may look like Jacob was too powerful for God so God had to poke his hip to stop him, it is the complete opposite. God poked Jacob’s hip to protect Him; He knew that Jacob would keep going and going and it would eventually end badly for him, so to protect him, God pokes his hip to slow him down and prevent him getting hurt even more. He needed to slow him down. He needed to get him to a place where he could see him face to face. Where Jacob could focus on God’s face and hear God’s voice because the thing is, it’s only when we stop and look at God face to face, when we slow down and come face to face with Jesus, that our lives are changed.

God wants us to sit face to face with our Saviour.

God will slow us down, and occasionally stop us completely, to protect us from ourselves. He wants us to be with Him face to face, without distraction, so that we can properly hear His voice. So that we can walk in the ways He wants us to, not the ways we want to, because we can be stubborn and cause ourselves harm without realising it. And it’s only after we are face to face with Jesus that we are changed.

‘the sun rose above him as he passed Peniel, and he was limping because of his hip.’ (Gen 32:31) 

Jacob called the place he wrestled with God Peniel and Peniel means face of God. Amid his wrestling, when God slowed him down, Jacob saw the face of God. Jacob walked away with a limp that stayed with him because he had been touched by God. And when God touches our lives, we are forever changed. We are never the same. It is in those moments of intimacy with God, when we are before Him, when our heart is stilled on Him and our eyes are fixed on Him, when we are looking Him face on, that He will touch us and change us forever.

What are we wrestling with God about today? What do we still need to surrender? Maybe today, we will allow God to slow us down, to stop us so that we can look Him in the eye. Maybe today, as we surrender over whatever it is we’re wrestling, God will touch ‘our hip’ and change us. Maybe today, we will see His face and be ever changed into the likeness of Jesus. Whatever it is you may be wrestling God for, I pray that you will see His face and be forever changed.

This post is cross posted at ACW and Looking In

Leila (Lays) Halawe is a Sydney based coffee loving nonfiction writer and blogger. She has published a short devotional, Love By Devotion, and shares her views on life and faith via her blog page Looking In . You can connect with her via Facebook at Leila Halawe Author  and via Twitter at Leila Halawe.

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What is God saying?

Devotion by Dianne J. Wilson @diannejwilson

Do you ever wish God would put some skin on and come sit in your lounge and explain exactly what He wants from you? I sure do. 

As a kid, I loved doing dot-to-dot puzzles. There was something deeply satisfying in watching something emerge from the seemingly random numbers.

I've come to realize that figuring out God's will is much like doing a dot-to-dot. But instead of pen and paper, you have events and promises. 

The numbers alone don't make much sense. When you start a new puzzle, all you see are numbers dotted on a page. None of them mean anything by themselves. But when you start connecting them, the bigger picture will emerge. When it comes to life, sometimes single events will leave you perplexed. Until you are able to step back and see those events in the bigger context of the rest of your life, you may find yourself sliding towards fear and unbelief.

So how do you do a real-life-what-is-God-up-to-dot-to-dot?

1. Pay attention

Take note of anything that happens that's out of the ordinary, Bible verses that stand out, conversations... Some things will be significant, some of them won't. But you won't know unless you keep track of them all. Before I landed my first official publishing contract with Pelican / Harbourlight, I was throwing all my energy into catching the attention of an agent. Three things happened that highlighted the phrase 'Harbourlight'. One in particular made me realize there was more to it all. A song on the radio caught my ear and when I investigated, it was by a local band called 'Harbourlight'. In my Googling, I fell over this publisher that stood for all the things that are in my heart when it comes to fiction. The best part? They are one of the few that are happy to accept un-agented submissions. I'm currently working on my fourth book for them.

2. Write them down

I find it useful to keep a journal and make notes of scriptures that pop, events, conversations, anything that seems vaguely significant. Every so often I read through and as I do so, similar themes often emerge. Patterns. As I home in those, I get a sneak-peak into what God is busy doing with me.

3. Be patient

Eugene Petersen wrote a book called A Long Obedience in the Same Direction. That sums it up nicely. The picture is seldom clear by dot number three. When it comes to complex puzzles, dot thirty is still a spaghetti mess. But as you continue to pay attention, listen, keep a soft heart, and do what He tells you to, His plan will emerge, perfect in design and timing. 

 

This puzzle of life is not sent to frustrate and exhaust you. It is a beautiful opportunity to choose to trust the One who holds the pencil of your future. He is good and His plans for you are good!

Dianne J. Wilson writes novels from her hometown in East London, South Africa, where she lives with her husband and three daughters. She is writing a three book YA series, Spirit Walker, for Pelican / Harbourlight. Affinity (book 1), releases on the 8th of June 2018

Finding Mia is available from Amazon, Pelican / Harbourlight, Barnes & Noble and other bookstores.

Shackles is available as a free ebook from Amazon & Smashwords.

Find her on Facebook, Twitter and her sporadic blog Doodles.

When God Leaves You In the Dark. Devotion by Dianne J Wilson

Some days I pop out of bed with a sparkle in my eye, excited about everything that God is doing in my life. I can see the purpose behind every chance meeting, strange happening, even the bad stuff makes sense. These are seasons of clear vision.

I wish I could say that this is always the case. Some days, I only just manage to peel myself out from under the duvet, the bad things gang up on me (really, Cat, you choose today to start using the carpet behind the couch as your toilet?) and I can't see the purpose in anything. On those days, I feel like God picked everyone to play on His team but me. Sometimes those days can carry on for weeks. Months. Years.

How do you make sense of being left in the dark like that? Well, here's a picture for you. Sometimes a mother hen tucks her little chicks under her wing. They are safe from predators, close to her heart, and though they cannot see where she's headed, it doesn't matter because they will be going with her. They can't see, but she can.

Sounds great, right? Not so much from the chick's perspective. He was just discovering how great worms taste and how well his little stick-legs work and now here his is, in Mom's armpit, sweaty feathers getting up his nose when he tries to breathe. Not exactly the high point of his chick-life.

And yet...

   He is close to her heart.

   He is safe from predators.

   Even though he doesn't know where he's going, momma hen does.

    He is held close enough to go with her no matter which way she turns.

If you're in a season of breathing in feathers in the dark, take heart! God has you close enough that you'll move with him whichever way he goes. Don't fight it, cuddle close. Tune in to his heartbeat. Allow him to take you with as he moves.  Trust him. It will be worth it!

Proverbs 3:6 “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”

Dianne J. Wilson writes novels from her hometown in East London, South Africa, where she lives with her husband and three daughters. She is writing a three book YA series, Spirit Walker, with Pelican / Harbourlight. Affinity (book 1), releases on the 8th of June 2018.

Finding Mia is available from Amazon, Pelican / Harbourlight, Barnes & Noble and other bookstores.

Shackles is available as a free ebook from Amazon & Smashwords.

Find her on Facebook, Twitter and her sporadic blog Doodles.

DEVOTION: Green pastures.

By Leila Halawe

"He makes me to lie down in green pastures...." Psalm 23:2 (NKJV)

I was reading psalm 23 the other day. This is one of my favourite psalms in the bible and throughout many seasons in my life, this psalm was my meditation. It is one that I can recite easily and think of often. I have a very active mind and imagination, so I tend to imagine the verses as I think of them as as I reflected over the words, I started to visualise it in my mind and when I got to verse two, He makes me lie down in green pastures, I imagined myself lying down in this beautiful field of green grass with beautiful trees scattered throughout. It was a peaceful image and one that bought a smile to my face as I reflected on God and His love for me. So, you can imagine my surprise when I did a little research and discovered that the image I had in my mind was almost the exact opposite of what David was describing.

Psalm 23 used the analogy of a shepherd with his sheep to illustrate God as the Shepherd in our lives. As His sheep, He guides and leads us along the way, however if we look at this from the lens of Ancient Israel, the scene looks very different to what I was imagining. If we look at shepherds in Israel, back during David’s time and even today, a large part of the path that shepherds herd their sheep on is rocky and rough terrain, that looks more like the picture below.

It was very much a desert of sorts that had minimal rain throughout the year, so there was a small amount of moisture in the air, however there was humidity, so between the moisture and humidity, there would be little droplets of water that fell on the rocks, and from there, little tufts of grass blades grew around the base of the rock. As the shepherds guided and led their sheep along the path, the sheep would stop and eat the little blades of grass before they kept moving to the next rock that had grass around it. This was, essentially, the shepherd leading them to greener pastures; greener pastures weren’t a field of grass but just enough grass to sustain the sheep at each point of their journey. I don’t know about you, but that sounds very much like God in my life.

I oftentimes wish that God would give me the full picture of what was going to happen in my life. I reason with God and say that if He shows me what lies ahead, at least I would know what was coming and could prepare for it. Unfortunately for me, God doesn’t work that way. He makes promises that He will faithfully fulfill, yet instead of giving us information He ask that we trust Him as He guides us there. He leads us to our own greener pastures, and sits with us while we lie down. For some of us, it is a welcome relief to reach the pasture and lie down, to be replenished, to sit in His presence. For others, God needs to make us lie down; He needs to bring us to a standstill so that we can stop and rest. So that we can see that in Him, we have all we need for right now.

And that, friends, is more than enough. We do not need to see the future because we can rest in the knowledge that the One that holds the future loves us and is for us. We can rest in our greener pastures knowing that He already knows where our next green pasture is. He knows how to get us there and He knows exactly what we will find there because He holds in all in His hands. 

Leila (Lays) Halawe is a Sydney based coffee loving nonfiction writer and blogger. She has published a short devotional, Love By Devotion, and shares her views on life and faith via her blog page Looking In . You can connect with her via Facebook at Leila Halawe Author  and via Twitter @LHalawe.

DEVOTION: What Do You Cling To? ~ by Yvonne Ortega

Psalm 63:8: “My soul clings to you; your right hand upholds me.”

“Has the hospital called you to make an appointment?” the receptionist from the local women’s clinic asked me over the phone.

My heart beat faster. My hands became clammy. “No, why should they?”

“Your mammogram wasn’t clear, and we want the hospital to repeat the procedure.” She paused for a second. “Call today for an appointment.”

That’s not a message a cancer survivor wants to hear. I wiped away the tears and prayed for mercy and God’s strength, I thought of Psalm 63, especially verse 8. I couldn’t think of anything or anyone I’d rather cling to than God himself. I felt weak and wanted God’s right hand to uphold me.

We will face crises or difficulties in life. What do we do when they come? When I spoke at a conference recently, I asked the women how they handle life’s stresses.

One woman told me she chews her fingernails and showed me her mutilated nails. Another said she ate chocolate, especially the dark kind, because it was good for her. However, she admitted she needed to lose weight.

An embarrassed woman confessed privately that she reverted to smoking cigarettes and drinking alcohol. Still another talked about shopping sprees.

A lady in excellent shape said she would exercise twice a day for two or three hours when she felt overcome with fear or worry.

If we are honest, many of us can identify a comfort food or some excess to handle or avoid life’s challenges. Our weak human nature attempts to come up with its own solution.

God longs for us to turn to him with our problems. He wants to uphold us.

Dear God, help me cling to you. Amen.

Copyright © by Yvonne Ortega January 23, 2013

OVER TO YOU: In what situation will you allow the Lord to uphold you this week? Tell us in a comment below.


Yvonne Ortega is a counselor, international bilingual speaker, trainer and eleven-year breast cancer survivor. She is the author of Finding Hope for Your Journey through Breast Cancer (Revell) and a contributing author to The Embrace of a Father (Bethany House) and Transformed (Wine Press). She has also been published in several magazines online and hard copy.

Yvonne hosted a blogtalkradio program on breast cancer, addiction, domestic violence, and other types of trauma. Archives are available. Visit her website

STORM CHASER

Photo Attribution:

National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration/

Department of Commerce

(Tornado near end of life)

We’re nearing the beginning of the tornado season here in East Tennessee. A few years back, during a rotational storm, every other house took on extreme wind and hail damage, each costing tens of thousands of U.S. dollars to repair. Unfortunately, the house I occupy happened to be one of the “other.” Before it struck, I had anticipated trouble when, in the quiet lull before that particular system, my pets tried to, uncharacteristically, hide inside the piano. That gave me a clue to take cover. The storm passed quickly, but left destruction in its wake. And although nerve racking, there existed a tinge of what I can only describe as thrill.

I questioned that, this sense of thrill, especially within a force so powerful and potentially life threatening. My mind began to wander, and I considered those who work as real storm chasers, tracking systems, racing with equipment in tow to the projected path of potential disaster. I have enjoyed watching documentaries on such curious people, who take great risks, seeking that big break. To capture evidence or footage unique to him/her and their perspective on the disturbance that lands them on the map of meteorological success. Storm chasers strike me not only as adventure seekers, but purpose-driven junkies.

Well, I suppose in a sense I am a storm chaser. Not literally, but forever and a day looking for atmospheric (spiritual) intensity, searching for that single event which could alter the course of my life.

Here is my oft spoken heavenly petition, “Here am I, God, stir up the gales a bit, please. Things have grown too sedentary again, and you know how that affects me.” I then proceed to solicit guidance and direction, and a stirring - His move and the winds of the Holy Spirit - in my life. At the same instance of asking for a squall over stillness, I recite the words: I look to you for protection. I will hide beneath the shadow of your wings until this violent storm is past. I cry out to God Most High, to God who will fulfill his purpose for me…Psalm 57:1-2  

Invite a storm and then request protective “backup” in order to get through it. Ha! Let me explain through H.P. Grant, who said it well, “We must free ourselves of the hope that the sea will ever rest. We must learn to sail in high winds.”

My thirst for skill and knowledge to achieve that high wind sail prevails. Though I paint a figurative picture of storm chasing, I suppose in my heart-of-hearts it’s the desire to have the strength of faith to survive, make it through anything, and capture that which I seem to desperately seek: God getting my attention in an irrefutable manner, rather than the other way around. So in the height of a terrible tempest, I have no choice but that He holds me steady as she goes.
 


 A veteran of the performing arts and worldwide missions, Tessa Stockton also contributed as a writer/editor for ministry publications, ghostwriter for political content, and headed a column on the topic of forgiveness. Today, she writes romance and intrigue novels in a variety of genres.
www.TessaStockton.com