Fear

"The Lord, Himself will fight for you. Just stay calm." (Exodus 14:14)

It's funny how fear can creep in at the most unexpected time.  
I'm not talking about a fear of spiders, mice or velour pants. I'm talking about disturbances that throw off your balance.

I have a fear of confrontation. 
Isn't that silly?
A woman over the age of (ahem) 40ish, afraid of heated conversations. And fights. And disappointments. One who would rather NOT tell a good friend that they have been hurt, and instead, pretend it never happened.

Sometimes the confrontations are childish, like, not liking what someone said about you. Or maybe it's even more silly, like when you really don't want to talk to the phone company about cancelling their services. 
But sometimes they feel so much more monstrous. Like when someone takes you to court and they want you to acquiese. Or your character is being defamed, and your friends are believing it.
What then?

I love how GOD's Word always pops up at the most perfect time. Always.  
I love how His Word is filled with examples of awful confrontations, including being hunted as a dog, so that you can be assured that He is there. No matter what.

Moses was chased by his enemies, while he was supposed to lead people to safety. Can you even imagine the stress? But GOD was there, wasn't He? Fed them, watered them, parted the Red Sea.
Noah had to build an ark amongst scourners and friends turning against him. And then he had to watch them all die. I'm sure he felt something, then.  GOD was there, too.  We have the glorious rainbow to remind us.
David was one of GOD's chosen and yet his friend, hunted him to kill him.  David had to hide in mountains, sleeping on rocks, but not sleeping because what if he didn't hear someone come in?  GOD was there.
Poor Mary had to deal with wondering whether or not Joseph would believe her, when she said that GOD chose her pregnancy and it wasn't another man.  I'm sure she didn't sleep well, either.  Imagine the worry, but also the joy of knowing you were chosen.

"Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, and whose hope is in the LORD." (Jer 17:7)

It is so easy to forget that we have the greatest Warrior on our side.  That He will take care of us. Sometimes it's easier saying the words, then believing them. But they're true.

So. Be brave, friend.  
"GOD'S got your back."

Jenn Kelly is a writer. Sometimes.

40-Day Card Challenge

I love Lent.

I grew up in the Catholic Church and the idea of giving up chocolate or sweets while I was growing up, made me feel like I was doing something important for GOD. That I could sacrifice a little something of myself for Him.

Of course, as I grew older, and my faith grew more mature, my 'sacrifice' became slightly different.  I learned that good behaviour and good acts do not solidify your position in heaven, and perhaps I should change my outlook on what I would do for those 40 days.

This year, it is the 40-Day Card Challenge.

Which means, that every day, during my quiet time, I try my best to allow GOD to choose whom I should pray for. Then during my Bible reading, I would write out the best verse I thought to encourage that person. I would then type it out in lovely font, tape it to a lovely card, and then write some kind words, cover the envelope in pretty stickers and then send it in the mail. These people would be friends, acquaintances, and even a few people whom I knew didn't like me (I just didn't put my name or return address on it).

I used to send cards all the time. I love sending cards. I would get such a thrill walking up and down the stationary stores and choose out the pretties cards, the coolest colours of envelopes, the sweetest stickers. I had a carousel of coloured felt-tip pens. I loved to do it, and I used to do it all the time.

Until I stopped.

Wasn't anything serious, it just slowly and gradually stopped. 
Maybe it was because I stopped hearing a 'Thank you', or a, 'You really made my day'.  
I wasn't doing it for the acknowledgement, to be sure, but at some point...you lose...the joy in doing it.  Even my closer friends, whom I know needed a card of encouragement, they wouldn't say a thing. And made me feel badly about our relationship.

Isn't that awful?

I am in full agreement that relationships are not what they used to be. It is extremely difficult to get friends to talk to you on the phone. I sometimes miss being sixteen, with my long curly phone cord winding its way around my room as I would gab for hours, my parents yelling at me to stop tying up the line.  I can't remember the last time I had a long conversation with someone on the phone. I kind of miss it, you know?

This tells me, that in our fast-moving, technologically-advanced age, that we need more cards in the mail.  I love getting cards, who doesn't?  Especially encouraging ones that say, 'Hey. I'm praying for you right now, and you didn't even ask me to.'

That is a wonderful 'sacrifice' that I am willing to make. And maybe after 40 days, the habit will stick, and I will keep doing it.  Because even though most of my relationships are through Facebook now, I can do my part by sending GOD's love through the mail. And that, to me, is a wonderful challenge.

And lets me buy more pretty greeting cards.

Jenn Kelly is a farmer who is getting back into writing. Slowly. If you would like a card in the mail, you can reach her at jennkelly@jennkelly.com. She will do her best to make sure you get an envelope with rooster stickers.

Is It Time, Yet?

I stopped writing last year.
It may have been longer than that, I don't remember.

Most of the year's writing has been comprised of homeschooling questions, work e-mails,  grocery lists and prayer requests.

I am comfortable with that. It isn't time. I have a twelve-year old who is unfortunately/fortunately really good at two extra-curricular activities and they take up a lot of time. I'm happy to encourage him and to make sure the house is warm and comfortable, and to make sure hubby is happy.

I'm good with that.

But a few weeks ago, I was flipping through Pintrest and a little caption caught my eye.

'Daily Journal Prompts'.

Hm.

So, I took a quick peek, began adding it to one of my 'pins' and moved on.
Well...a week ago, I ordered a gorgeous leather covered journal. Just for writing in. Not devos, not grocery lists, but for writing in.  And I began the daily prompts.

Some are very cool, like, if you could go anywhere this year, where would you go? And this requires a good paragraph.
Some don't get me writing at all, such as,  do your actions match your words? Mostly.

But it's a beginning.  And when you start at the beginning, it's a very good place to start.

You can check links here:   Because maybe you need a kickstart too.

If you aren't being called to write, right now, because of pressing life responsibilities, then please, don't feel guilty. If it's time to write, and it's pulling on your heart, then please, pick up a pen and a lovely journal and begin at the beginning.  God will tell you.

Happy Writing!!

Jenn Kelly is not trying to do it all. And neither should you.

Fear Not

'The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my GOD is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.' (Psalm 18:2)


I'm sure you have noticed that most of the news lately, has been depressing.  

People are worried, afraid, angry.

So much anger.

You can't even post a simple comment on your facebook/twitter/instagram  page about trusting in God, without backlash. Without having to defend yourself.  And of course you have to defend yourself carefully, because anger begets anger. 

(' A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.' Pr 15:1)

Anger is like a wildfire. It just takes the tiniest spark, and then spreads, consuming everything in its path.  Anger is contagious, just needing a few people to feed it, then it continues on, infecting, devouring, destroying more people.  

Fear causes anger. 

Fear reminds you that you are not in control of your life and that you are not safe.  If you don't feel safe, you can't be at peace. If you aren't at peace, anger takes over. A state of entitlement. A state that you are right and the world is wrong.  A state in which a heart hardens, and generosity is extinguished.


I had to explain to my son the rational behind peoples' fears.  As to why it makes them do irrational things.  Why we aren't supposed to be afraid.

If we are afraid, we can't function properly. We can't love properly. We can't worship GOD.  

Here's the thing that a lot of us seem to forget: 

The world is not going to get better. This is not a time of peace. We are not going to magically have someone show up and fix everything - stopping wars, hatred, injustice.  Because if the 7 years of peace is here, then we missed something huge. And if we missed it, then we have some serious praying and kneeling to do.

As believers, we need to stand strong. We need to be fearless, we need to be patient, we need to show compassion and kindness, and we need to not be angry.  And if we are angry, we need to change that anger quickly into positive actions.

We cannot be afraid.  What good are we to GOD, and to others, if we are afraid?

Sometimes I'm afraid.

Sometimes it takes me touching the walls in my house as I get ready for bed, praying for protection from robbers/bears/rapists and earthquakes.  It involves me waking up in the middle of the night, hearing a noise and reminding myself out loud that I am safe.

Sometimes it takes me waking up my husband in the middle of the night to pray for me as anxiety and terror kicks in.

Sometimes it takes me pinching myself so that I remember to think as God does; with compassion, with love, with gentleness.

'Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.' (Eph 4:31)

My dear friends, we have some very ugly times ahead.  Be brave. Be kind. Be gentle and offer kind words and open your hearts and homes. Look for the good in people. Look for the love.  Be love. Be GOD's love.

Have your answer ready.

Jenn Kelly is an author who hasn't written squat in 6 months because farming takes up a lot of work. But she looks forward to writing again in the future. Maybe when her child leaves for University. Who knows?

Thankful

It is that glorious time of year, where us Canadians in the North, get to celebrate, Thanksgiving.

It always comes up so quickly. I have always preferred it be in November, but then of course, we usually have two feet of snow on the ground and we aren't celebrating the harvest.  But we always have to wait longer for Christmas to arrive, it seems.  Right now, I believe it's about 83 days to go. I

The leaves are changing their glorious colours, and then they drift to the frosty grass so we can crunch them with our rubber boots.

People sneak into pumpkin patches to take photos of their children climbing on the largest pumpkins and then post them on Facebook.

Dilapidated barns and sheds look so much more magical and romantic.

See my dilapidated barn? Doesn't it look magical and romantic? It has mice.

The moon is so much more crisp, so much larger than ever before, that one cannot help but just...stare.

That's my neighbour's house.

 The harvest is ready for picking with fresh, crunch carrots, tiny pearl quinoa grains, solid butternut squash...

Me and my carrots.

And sometimes a little surprise of hard, crunchy red corn which is perfect for decorating your house.



But one thing to remember, amidst the pumpkin spice lattes, snuggly socks and your favourite sweaters, is to remember to be thankful.  

Just as Easter reminds us that Jesus died to save us all, and Christmas reminds us of His glorious birth, and birthdays remind us of a loved one, anniversaries remind us of our sweet soul mates, Valentine's day reminds us to love, Thanksgiving is to be thankful. 


Life can be horribly hard. It can be wrought with pain and angst and loss of loved ones. 

But life can also be filled with moments of joy, of laughter that happens deep in your belly, of letters, of showing kindness, of babies being born, of new jobs, of someone being healed.

A thankful heart is a happy heart.

This year we have decided to have a 'Thankful jar'.  Just a plain jar that one can put little notes into. To write down every single day, what we are thankful for. And on Christmas Eve, we will read them all.  


My dear friends.  Despite your situation... will you be thankful? Will you look for those hidden gems and realize that you do have many blessings that might be in disguise?

I am thankful for you.
Don't give up on your writing.
Don't give up on your reading.
And do not, under any circumstance, give up on GOD.  Because He is thankful, for you!

Do you have any Thanksgiving traditions?

Stand

a repeat from awhile ago...and it still stands true today...




“…and after you have done everything, to stand.” Ephesians 6:13

After you have done everything. 
I guess that means everything. 
Everything you can possibly think of,
Everything you can physically do,
Everything that anyone can suggest to you.
Everything that GOD has asked you to do.
To stand.

Just stand there. 
Do nothing.
Don’t think
Don’t act
Don’t worry
Don’t complain
Don’t argue
Don’t do anything.
Just stand.

Stand and wait.
Stand and pray.
Stand and trust.
Stand and have peace.
Stand and rest.

Let GOD take care of it. 

Let Him do what He needs to do.
Let Him take control of the situation.
Let Him tell you what to do.
Let Him make you wait.

Just stand.

“The LORD will fight for you; you need only be still.” Exodus 14:14

Jenn Kelly is an author/farmer/gardener/wife/mom/care-taker... figuring it all out, just like you. Be strong; be brave; trust GOD. He has this.  

Sharing Your Work

I wonder if there is a line.
You know that line where you have the opportunity to share something, and you over-share? Or under-share?  And then you wonder if anyone thinks you're absolutely crazy because you just shared?

How do you share your writing work?

When someone asks you, 'What are you working on?', do you shrug your shoulders, look down at the ground and mumble, 'Oh, just another middle-grade fiction...takes place in New York... so how's your dad doing?'
Or do you tell them, 'Well, I'm working on another novel, and it's not quite like the last two, it's completely different, but it's still the same genre, and this time the character is just a little bit older, and he lives in New York with his dad, but his dad died, see, and he has to figure out how to take out the bad guys by himself, and it all takes place during the early 2000, because then it wouldn't really work...' and they turn away.

When you're invited to teach a little lesson on how to write a mystery, and you decide to share a few pages of your book with the class, do you read really quickly? Do you skip over sentences and words because you think you might bore them? Do you shrug your shoulders and say, 'sorry' a lot because you think that they can write better than you? Do you interrupt yourself constantly and explain why you wrote that sentence, what you were feeling, what you ate during that page-writing session and how it reminded you that you had to pay your taxes etc?

How does one find that line, to carefully walk upon, and not fall off?

Some writers are boring with their constant Facebook statuses and their twitter accounts, bragging about their writing, putting about 50 words with hashtags in front of them, trying to tease the reader but are just annoying.
 Some writers are mean with their elusive Facebook statuses and their twitter accounts, not saying a single word, or just saying a single word, trying to tease the reader but are annoying because they make you wait and wonder impatiently what they are talking about.
 Some writers are perfectly witty with their laughable Facebook statuses and their twitter accounts, showing gif's of puppies running into glass doors and babies falling asleep, trying to tease the reader, but just make the reader fall in love with them.

How do we know if we have fallen off that line?


I have no idea.

I guess it all boils down to the question of, are we being humble?  Are we being kind? Are we being encouraging of other writers? Are we keeping our mouths shut about writers we don't care for? Are we able to honestly have joy, not envy in our hearts when a writer has success, and we don't?  Are we able to close our eyes at night and realize that we are doing our best, our honest-to-goodness best?

Are you?

Jenn Kelly is a farmer who is supposed to be writing.  This is a photo of her vegetable garden because she is so busy she can't think straight, let alone post these thoughts first thing in the morning when she was supposed to. Regardless of all of that, she thinks you're very lovely and you should be writing more and she believes in you. But much more importantly, GOD believes in you.

I Had a Point.

When I get the honour of writing for this blog, I never know whether to stick to writing topics, or personal GOD stuff. Everyone here who is a member of this blog, they are writing. Like, all the time. They talk about how awesome it is, how GOD is encouraging them and showing them new things and using old ideas and how they are witnessing cool stuff as they write, talk about writing, publishing etc...

Yeah, I've got nothing.

Sorry, that wasn't correct. I'm teaching language to my eleven year old so...

I don't have anything to write about.

I've wondered if maybe the members-in-charge have thought about letting me go, but they are too polite and kind to do so.  So...this is their out, if they'd like me to go until I start writing again.  I just don't have the time. I'm still trying to figure out some kind of routine so life makes sense. All I know is, that right now life doesn't make sense. So, instead of talking about writing, let's go the personal GOD stuff.

So.

I belong to a bible study. Well, it's not really a bible study because at the moment we aren't studying the bible, we are doing the Focus on the Family DVD thingy that I can't remember the name of. There are a lot of people packed into that living room.  I'm embarrassed to say that we finally went last week, and it was session three...oops.  I don't want to talk about what we watched, instead I want to tell you how I seem to start talking like a dribbling fool whenever I open my mouth.

Does that ever happen to you?

I like to think of myself as educated. Not illustriously educated, because even though I attended three universities and one college, I have obtained only one degree. In Forestry.  Still, I remember how to use words that are more than three syllables and I express myself most meticulously when I am angry (my poor husband). However...

At the bible study, a question was asked if married couples ever did devotions together or separately.

My mind was whirring with excellent answers on how to convey my personal reasons behind why I did not care to.  Specifically, that I felt my time with the Lord, was MY time and I didn't care to share any revelations with my husband until I had thoughtfully chewed on what exactly GOD was telling me. 

So, I put my hand up a little, and began speaking when there was a lull.

"I prefer to have my own time with GOD, because whenever hubby is like, 'Hey, let's pray right now', I'm all like, what? No way, man, I'm a petulant child and you can't tell me what to do, dude."


I am so eloquent.

You can just imagine the crowd's reaction to my carefully planned words.  I'm sorry to say, this happens frequently. 

I have discovered that sometimes, I am only any good at expressing myself as though I were a surfer from the 80's, who just wants to hang ten and then chill after.

Why is that?

I think I can tell you why. Yes, after all this blather, I can tell you why.

GOD needs to be personal.  It makes me absolutely bonkers to hear people go on and on using words like; blessings, loved-on, praying about it, GOD told me...

Please excuse me if I have offended you. I'm not done explaining.  

I came to a point in my life where after having been 'church-jaded' that I am tired of the flowing hymns and flowery prayers, and the same words over and over again, same prayers, same words, same words, same words...and they don't mean anything. They mean emptiness and because you held your hands up and said, Amen, during most of the sermon, I feel even more empty because I couldn't hear anything over your cacophonous mumbling.  I wonder if other people feel the same way?

So to make GOD more personal and effective for me, I call Him, Dude.  When I ask Him for help 'cause I'm freakin' out, He tells me to chill and just breathe for a minute because I'm making a mess.  When I'm walking on the farm and I see the clouds, I say, "Dude. Look at that. YOU did that. You're so awesome. Look at all your talent. Thanks, Man". And He's like, "Yup. I'm the bomb. And you're righteous for loving Me".

This works better for us.  


I've been following this blogger, Jamie the Very Worst Missionary.  She's a pastor's wife in California, with three grown teenagers and she swears sometimes and she's a mess sometimes, but she is so right.  I found her by accident and I was like, Yes! That's exactly how I feel!  And then a tiny part of me wonders if I'm being blasphemous.  
At the same time, I love listening to Ravi Zacharias .  He is ridiculously educated and I love how plainly he speaks, yet evoking all of the intelligence required to explain.  And of course there are the Insight For Living links and Joyce Meyer bits on the radio.  

I'm not sure what my point is in this post.  I guess it would be that; a) I don't speak well to others, b) I love the vibes between me and GOD and c) be yourself.
There shouldn't be pomp and circumstance when talking to GOD. But remember not to be a jerk to Him, because that's just rude.  He deserves a lot of respect and given He's going to be taking care of you, you could be more grateful than sniveling. 

"For there is no partiality with GOD." (Romans 2:11)

Peace out.

Jenn Kelly is...not writing.  But she thinks you're very pretty and smart.

The New Year Word

For the past few years (4? 5?) I have made it a practice to choose a word for the year.  I love how words can be so powerful and so meaningful, that I think one should always be careful of how they use them. But that's another story.
Last year, the word was 'Cultivate'.
I made a point of getting out of my comfort zone, and well, cultivating. Cultivating new relationships, cultivating new plants, cultivating chickens (kind of) and remembering during my quiet time with GOD, to focus on what that word means.

This year's word came to me through an unexpected manner, and it was watching a youtube video someone had posted, of an Oprah interview with Will Smith and his family. Odd, isn't it? I'm not one to really watch interviews, I mean, when the boy was younger, I'd throw on 'Kelly and Regis' while cleaning the house, but it really isn't appropriate to leave on now. And of course, Regis has been replaced. I like Will Smith, and I like his wife who seems very fearless, and I'm all for fearless women. It was a very interesting video; they discussed how they handled raising Will's son from his previous wife, how they have business meetings to discuss their goals and how to achieve them, and how they push through the pain and injuries to get done what needs to be done.  At one point, they were discussing Will's grandmother and how she firmly believed that she was put on earth to make things better.  To make a point of making everything better that she encountered, whether situations or people. And I thought, 'Huh.'

BETTER.

Yesterday, I was flipping through my Joyce Meyer devos on my Youversion bible app, and she talked about how because she had grown up with abuse, it made her a negative person, that she always looked for the negative in everything. And in consequence, everything happening around her and to her, was negative. She said, "I decided I wanted positive things to happen to me, so I started believing positive things, and over time, received positive results!" Now, of course this sort of sounds like those crazy speakers who tell you that if you really truly look for love and money and health, you'll find it.  But then during the prayer part, Meyer said, "...and start believing for better things."

BETTER.

I'm not totally sure if I am making sense in all my rantings.  I want very much to clarify that BETTER doesn't mean to me that I am going to look for better things and put myself into better situations.  What it does mean to me is that I want to be in control of making things BETTER. Because we all have control over our own behaviours, actions and words.  So how can I, make it BETTER?

Well, after a lot of thought and prayer, I have decided to try and leave things better than they were found. I will purposefully make each situation better, whether through serving better cookies at a coffee date, or encouraging someone so they feel better, or putting on a bigger smile when I don't feel like it - to better a relationship, or clean my house a bit better or put more effort into meals so they taste better or ...so on.
I want to be able to be a blessing to what I encounter. I want to be that person who can make people feel good about themselves. I want the confidence to look back in one year and say, 'Yeah, I made it better'.
And this isn't because I can do it.  Oh, good grief, no way. I am not a normally positive person. I'm introverted, I prefer my own company, I am prone to whining when I don't get my own way. I am the first to look at the downside and to wonder immediately what someone wants when they say, 'hey, let's have coffee'. I always try to control the situation and I have moments where I hide in bed. I'm so pleasant.
I'm only doing this because GOD can make me do it. Only He can tell me what to say, what to do and how to behave, in order that I can bring a smidgen of His awesome Light into someone else's life. Because I firmly believe that as I am a child of GOD, if I'm not even trying to be like Him, what use am I? Jesus makes everything better. And I ain't Jesus. But I can try to be like Him. Because He's 17 kinds of awesome.

So. Here is to BETTERing the year.

Now I'm curious though. Does anyone else have a word?


May GOD bless you and make you feel like your heart is going to explode with love.

Jenn Kelly is a writer. This is a picture of a cat. She was looking for a photo to upload and came across a bunch of pictures that somehow ended up in her hard-drive dated for August. But she didn't upload any of these photos. And she has no idea where these photos were taken or by whom.  Especially the photos of televisions in garages and bathtubs and lamps. No idea. So if anyone knows who this cat is, let her know. 

Over-Reacting

I am behind on my posting. And for that I am very sorry.

I have a constant twitch behind my right eyeball. It won't go away. I've tried using cold compresses, hot compresses, washing my eyelid with baby soap (Doctor's suggestion) and still, it twitches shut.
It's not that I am stressed. At least, I don't think I'm stressed.

Sure, I'm trying to do too much around here, I mean, we did move to a farm, we now have egg-laying hens, and hubby is building a greenhouse now while the sun shines, and I'm home-schooling again, and I have to take over all of the administration for our tree company...

How did I let life get so out-of-control?

I was actually at a point in my life where I was the 'be' person and not the 'do' person.  It was all about hanging out with the boys and enjoying good meals and resting.

Now it's all about vegetable gardening, and teaching, and cleaning, and building a chicken coop, and making sure we spend time with friends, and trying to keep a stiff upper lip about our new church.

How on earth did that happen?

Why did I let the guilt slip in of not doing enough?

How did I get to the point where I am constantly whispering, "Peace, Jesus, peace"...?

Life could be so much worse.

One year ago, today, I celebrated my birthday in Tennessee with amazing people because we were homeless. When we finally moved in, we agreed to cultivate relationships as much as we could.  And we have been.  Inviting strangers over for food and clay-shooting.  Making a point of having conversations with people at the Farmers' Market for the sake of beginning a relationship. Giving away produce to people who need it.  Trying my hardest to remain calm and smiling as the church ladies ignore me every Sunday.
Wow, I sound like a pitiful, whining martyr.

I'm not, you know. I think I'm just pooped. Wait, can I say that word on here?

I don't have any wise words or sage advice for you. Because I'm at a very weird point in my life that isn't familiar at all.  Wouldn't it be nice if sometimes we could go through certain scenarios again, just for the sake of being able to say, 'Oh, ok, I know how to handle this'.  It's very easy to forget who you are.
Sometimes we're all just muddling through and all I'm able to do is muddle.

So. As y'all as my witness, I'm going back to 'being', instead of 'doing'.  I think I will take a year off of entertaining people and maybe sleep more. See if we are invited anywhere interesting. Let people love on me for awhile.  Unless that's totally selfish. Is that selfish? See? Just muddling through, all confused and over-reacting and over-thinking.

So, to you sweet people who are muddling through, may I suggest to just whisper, "Peace, Jesus, peace". Because even if you aren't going through all kinds of awfulness, and no one is dying and there isn't a crisis, you can ask for peace when your brain is fuzzy and you can't remember where you left your wallet.

Even in silly, trivial times.

Now, go and 'be'.





Jenn Kelly is supposed to be a writer, but she hasn't written in ages because half the time she can't find her laptop.  She'd put up a photo but frankly, she can't find the hard-drive. Feel free to invite her for dinner.

Tired of Writing?

Do you ever get tired of writing?
I know I do.
Yes, I have my ideas and pages waiting to be finished, but lately, I just couldn't be bothered.
And maybe that's my own fault.

Sometimes a person has too many passions and interests. Sometimes you just need to spend an entire 12 hours out in your vegetable garden, weeding (yes, some people get great satisfaction out of yanking tall weeds, please, be quiet). Or maybe you need to spend the next two weeks devouring cooking recipes and grocery stores/farmers' markets to create new delectable goodies.  Or maybe you just really need to read four books in a row, because they are so good. Perhaps you just want to reorganize your house and collect new paint colours for the walls.  Maybe it's time to build a brand new chicken coop.  Or that fabric that has been collecting in your storage/guest/ craft room, is finally being sewn into a pretty, flouncy skirt you've always wanted to make.  Or maybe you're spending the summer just sitting...sitting on the front porch with tea, sitting in a lawn chair in front of the fire pit, sitting in the grass watching the clouds, sitting on an air mattress making water ripples with your fingers, sitting in the dirt picking peas and beans, sitting on the back step watching butterflies, dragonflies, brown thrashers, wrens all flutter about,  sitting on your bed under a blanket and typing your post for the day that you kinda forgot about.

And that's ok.  Because everyone needs a change in their own creativity to help kick-start something later on.

So unless you're on a deadline, why don't you slow down a little?  Take up finger-painting, learn to knit, finally make that charred barbecue sauce you've never made, learn to can pickles, read too many magazines, write a letter to a friend using ink and paper.  There's nothing wrong with changing it up a little and channeling your passions into other outlets.

I promise you won't forget how to write...

See? Still writing. Sort of...

So don't be afraid to...take a break. Cause you might need one.

Jenn Kelly really is a writer, just not lately. She is too busy lying in fields and watching ladybugs and caterpillars. See, she's right there in that photo on the left...on the other side of the camera.  When she's not cooking, farming vegetables, cleaning her house (ahem), swimming, or just sitting, you can find her writing...actually, that's not true. She hasn't written anything in awhile.  But if you'd like to see her farm, well, here it is.  She encourages you to keep writing and ignore the fact that she is not writing.

Why We Write

I know that as a writer, keeping a journal is a must. I have notebooks from high school that are worn-torn and plastered with drawings, stickers, doodles, and quotes that I want to keep as reminders. As memories of things that happened and who I was.

This is the bottom of one bookshelf. All the notebooks on the bottom left are journals and poems and short stories. The folders to the right are stories from High School. And fairy tales. The next shelf contains more journals and novels I'm working on (slowly).  I have a box of daytimers from long ago that I can't quite throw out because there are pages with notes and newspaper clippings of births and deaths and a romantic treasure hunt from my 3rd anniversary.  Because I have been so busy lately, I haven't done as much journaling as I would like.  As I flipped through the latest Conde Nast Traveler magazine (I read a lot), I came across this page...

Sorry it's sideways. I have no idea how to fix that.
  

This gentleman, who is an artist, kept 5 Moleskin notebooks with him as he traveled the Pacific Crest Trail, from California to Washington state. He took his time and painstakingly captured the essence of his travels.  Isn't it beautiful?  There is something...magical about taking the time to draw what you see, instead of taking a photo. I mean, how many times have you tried to capture a perfect sunset, and you look at the photo and it's not the same? Granted, we are not all artists. I mean, there is no way I could draw a campground like that. But it's the details, you know? He managed to tell his stories and experiences by drawing them.

Why do we write?

Is it because we have something to say? Something oh so important? Do we want to change the world with our words, touch people's hearts and their minds with our words and descriptions?

Is it because we have a very cool story spinning in our dreams and we need to get it on paper?

Is it because we think we could write better than Joe-Sho and make money at it?

Is it because we want to entertain with our witty words?

Is it because it's cathartic?

Is it because you are leaving a legacy? Something for your grandchildren to read in amazement and love at your life?

Is it because all of a sudden we slow down our busy lives and take the time to carefully construct sentences and dialogue that brings us back to a memory we had, an experience that changed us, a moment so beautiful or so tragic that we weep on our keyboard?

If I may be so bold as to say so, think long and hard about why you write.  

Don't let money or publishing contracts or failure or success define you. That's the same as letting the world tell you who you are. No one can do that but GOD.

Writing is a purely creative gift that you need to embrace and cultivate and practice.  The world can only tell you if you're marketable to certain people.

If you have a burning rush in your heart, why are you stopping it?

I apologize for the length of this post, but I love this poem below.  While I don't agree with all the words in it, it has a burning passion in it that I'm sure you will understand.

so you want to be a writer?

Charles Bukowski, 1920 - 1994

if it doesn’t come bursting out of you
in spite of everything,
don’t do it.
unless it comes unasked out of your
heart and your mind and your mouth
and your gut,
don’t do it.
if you have to sit for hours
staring at your computer screen
or hunched over your
typewriter
searching for words,
don’t do it.
if you’re doing it for money or
fame,
don’t do it.
if you’re doing it because you want
women in your bed,
don’t do it.
if you have to sit there and
rewrite it again and again,
don’t do it.
if it’s hard work just thinking about doing it,
don’t do it.
if you’re trying to write like somebody
else,
forget about it.


if you have to wait for it to roar out of
you,
then wait patiently.
if it never does roar out of you,
do something else.

if you first have to read it to your wife
or your girlfriend or your boyfriend
or your parents or to anybody at all,
you’re not ready.

don’t be like so many writers,
don’t be like so many thousands of
people who call themselves writers,
don’t be dull and boring and
pretentious, don’t be consumed with self-
love.
the libraries of the world have
yawned themselves to
sleep
over your kind.
don’t add to that.
don’t do it.
unless it comes out of
your soul like a rocket,
unless being still would
drive you to madness or
suicide or murder,
don’t do it.
unless the sun inside you is
burning your gut,
don’t do it.

when it is truly time,
and if you have been chosen,
it will do it by
itself and it will keep on doing it
until you die or it dies in you.

there is no other way.

and there never was.

 Please keep writing. If only for yourself.

Jenn Kelly is a writer. And for now, that is enough. You can reach her at www.loveandoregano.com because right now she's writing about the farm-life.

Windy Days

The wind is fickle.

Today was a ridiculously, windy day. Because our farm is at the top of a hill, and we only have a few trees nearby, it's usually always windy. But today the wind was a regular 27km/hour with bursts of 50km/hr.
I headed outside, with eye protection, and tried to rig open the doors of my cold frames so they wouldn't get too hot, but keep the doors slightly closed so the tomatoes wouldn't dry out.  I chased the lid of our ash bin down the hill. I removed a rubbermaid lid from under the van to refasten to my soil bin.  I tied the bird feeder to the tree because it kept blowing off.  I watched my recycling tumble down the hill and slide into the cow fence, which I will retrieve tomorrow.
Although it was windy, the sun beat down fiercely, so of course I had to open the windows. Funny, old, windows that slide upwards, and then you jam a large nail into the hole and let the window sit on it. Then you use the very tips of your fingers to slide up the storm windows to expose the screen. And then you vacuum up all the dead flies and ladybugs. Farm life.

I opened the windows and went back to laundry. And smash.

Why would I remember that when the wind blows in, it's going to blow everything inside my house?

Fifty kilometer winds, inside my house. On cleaning day.  Which meant recycling on the floor in the kitchen, papers all over the island, soil on the island because I'm still seeding, water bottles half-full, freshly folded cloths.  Papers all over my desk upstairs - bills, notes, lists, school work. Two orchids, in full flower.

I was grumpy.

When I'm grumpy I do one thing. I clean.  I would like to point out here that my house is not clean very often.  But when I catch myself being grumpy, instead of cleaning, I do my quiet time.  I sat down in my big plush flowery chair, right in the alcove of my bedroom, ignoring my orchids, and opened my Bible.

"Ascribe to the LORD the glory of due His Name; worship the LORD in the splendor of His Holiness." (Psalm 29:2)

I closed my book and watched outside the window for a bit.

Twittering, silly goldfinch, clawing at the feeder to hang on. They only feed when it's bad weather.
Tiny, clumps of bright green new spring leaves on the tips of the trees.
The fresh smells of the slightly stagnant river and clean grass.

Isn't it amazing how the wind can blow what it chooses to? It can be destructive, or it can be a blessing.  I can choose to let the wind freshen up my house, or let it throw everything into chaos.
It's all about perspective.
It's all about behaviour.
It's all about what you allow into your home.

And it's all about checking which way the wind is blowing before you open the window.

Jenn Kelly is an author who loves fresh air. She is still working on a work-in-progress and another work-in-progress.  You can find her at www.loveandoregano.com while she's pretending to be a farmer.

A Creative Moment

I didn't think I'd be writing another book. I figured I'd stop and just focus on homeschooling, running our little tree business, and tending my new farm (feel free to peek here. Wait, am I allowed to do that?)
But.
GOD has a funny way of...shoving you face first into things. Like how when you're unpacking your kitchen and you're listening to music and all of a sudden, wham! You need to write, like, right now! And you start your furious typing, and you jot down notes on whatever scrap paper is beside you and then you get frustrated because you can't remember what you were thinking about and then you remember again...
For me, I try not to ignore these little moments. These flashes of inspiration that hit me. So I try to feed the fire by increasing my music listening, reading some moving quotes and praying.
I have notebooks of quotes that I love.  Messy, recycled notes that I had to write down and file away because I loved them so much. Powerful words. Words that build me up and soften my heart. Words to make me brave, courageous and fearless. Words to remind me of who I am and Whose I am.

These are some of my favourite that entice me to write. They encourage me into thinking about characters and emotions they are experiencing and plot movement. I hope they move you too. Some of them do not have the author's name because either I couldn't remember, or I had a moment of brilliancy and wrote it myself.

'You have to be brave with your life so that others can be brave with theirs.' (Katherine Center)

'Be soft. Do not let the world make you hard. Do not let the pain make you hate. Do not let the bitterness steal your sweetness. Take pride that even though the rest of the world may disagree, you still believe it to be a beautiful place.' (Iain Thomas)

'Why should you be beaten anymore? Why do you persist in rebellion? Your whole head is injured, your whole heart afflicted. From the sole of your foot to the top of your head, there is no soundness - only wounds and welts and open sores, not cleansed or bandaged or soothed with olive oil.' (Isaiah 1:5-6)

'Quit being the victim.'

'But have you seen inside her?'

'It was just a kiss.'

'...they sing of the days of their glory, they sing of their exploits of old, of maidens and knights, and of fiery fights, and guarding vast caches of gold...' (Jack Prelutsky - The Dragons are Singing Tonight)

'When you write a story, you're telling yourself the story...' (Stephen King)

'The trick is to look like you belong.'

'If you want to find out what's behind these cold eyes, you'll just have to claw your way through this disguise.' (Pink Floyd - The Wall)

'The difference between a lady and a flower girl is not how she behaves, but how she's treated. I shall always be a flower girl to Professor Higgins, because he always treats me as a flower girl, and always will; but I know I can be a lady to you, because you always treat me as a lady, and always will.' (G.B.Shaw - Pygmalion)

'But Lancelot mused a little space; He said, 'She has a lovely face;''  (Lord Tennyson - the Lady of Shalott)

'Why can't I see myself in your eyes?' (the Last Unicorn)

'You are every woman who ever lived before you. But this is your body you move and no one else's. Your heart that beats so loud and so strong. This is your body that bends and dances, nobody else's. This your time that is passing. Your life that is just beginning to go.' (an old Nike ad. I think)

'I'll wait up in the dark, for you to speak to me, I'll open up, release me...' (Pearl Jam - Release)

'What's all amazing that keeps us stargazing and what do we think we might see? Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection, the lovers, the dreamers and me.' (Kermit the Frog - Rainbow Connection)

I have a zillion more.

I hope these inspired you. I hope they gave your heart a flutter and perhaps some words came to your fingers, itching to be let out.
Would you care to share your favourite quotes? Words that move you, even now as you reread them?

Jenn Kelly is an author who is getting back at the game. She enjoys soy chai lattes and mushroom risotto.  She lives on a farm and has thirty-million ideas for it.  This photo was taken a long time ago because she can't find her cord to upload new photos. She no longer has those awesome slippers. Which is a pity because they were very comfortable.  Her work space is normally messier than this. You can find her at www.jennkelly.com but she hasn't been there in over a year. 

Passions

A conversation between two friends via texting:


Her: ...this is so important. Yes, I don't expect an easy route! It's already been hard...it won't get any easier.

Me:  Dontcha love growing?

Her: Yeah, I do. There's no fun in it. But apparently it's good for me. I'd like to have your wisdoms. And to have your knowledge of how to grow and take care of plants...because I kill mine.

Me: Ha!!! MY wisdoms involved me living through h*** for many years! And I used to kill plants too. But right now you focus on your babies and your passions...

Her: Lol. I guess killing plants comes before growing them. You must tell me about your h*** experience. My babies and my passions...so many of them! :)

Me: Well just pick one passion cause you got babies! And that'll be your 'escape'. (note: 'got babies' is a reference to a hip hop song from the early 90's. naughty by nature, maybe?)

Her: What's your passion?

Me: That's the million dollar question, isn't it? Before the boy and while pregnant, I did four plays. When the boy was born, painting with acrylics. When he was older, two published novels. Now it's all about starting an organic vegetable farm.  It's about choosing one passion to focus on that's good for the time being. I love to read - but with the boy being home-schooled and me giving my all when hubby gets home, there's isn't a ton of time.
Music is a huge passion. I love music. Everything. I love analyzing it and making sense of lyrics and comparing how a musician changes over the years...I'm such a hipsters it's pathetic.
A passion is something you do that makes you smile, which in turn, makes God smile because you are happy.  When I sit in my garden and plant something new or pick out dead leaves, I feel God smiling.
What do you do that makes God smile because you are happy?

Her: Music. Am crying right now as I'm playing 'Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus' on the piano. Singing the lyrics. And praying.



Passion is the joy that fills you. What God stirs in your heart to get you so excited that you can't sleep at night because you can't stop thinking about it.
I think when it comes to writing, there are good days and bad days.  But I want to encourage you, that if you are not on a deadline and you are 'not' feeling the passion - stop writing.  I know it's the opposite of what writers tell you, they tell you to write everyday, no matter what.  But have you ever read something and tossed it aside because you know that the author was 'faking it'?  Don't just write a novel for the sake of getting it done.  It makes me so... sad to see authors churn out novels, whether published or not, just for the sake of writing a novel. 

Find that drive inside you, let it build up until it's an inferno of excitement and beautiful words and real, raw emotions...and then write it out.  Let God help you find that passion inside you and let Him help you write it out.
Because God expects our best. Even while writing.

Now go find your passion.

Jenn Kelly is an author who is taking a time-out to deal with other passions in her life, such as gardening.  And she is still waiting for her house to sell so she can begin her next dream of an organic vegetable farm.  But the novel is still brewing inside. Oh yes, always on the backburner until it flames into a novel. You can reach her at www.jennkelly.com, but honestly, she hasn't been there in months because there is nothing to talk about except for gardening and given she writes children's novels, why would they want to read about it?

Interview With Valerie Comer

Valerie and I first met on-line, when she offered to interview me for my books, which I thought was wonderful, and then invited me to join this prestigious group of bloggers.  And now I am honoured to interview her for her new book, the second in the series, 'Wild Mint Tea'.

The second tale in the Farm Fresh Romance series, WILD MINT TEA, finds chef Claire Halford, one of the three girls who created Green Acres Farm, one year later, juggling a job she hates and trying to get the farm off the ground.  When they agree to trial-host a wedding, the bride-to-be's brother is none other than Noel Kenzie. The same man who turned down Claire for a job in his reforestation camp as head cook.  With swooning glances, misunderstood arguments, delicious cooking, a change of heart and a forest fire, Claire and Noel are one couple you can't help hope get together in the end. You can purchase Valerie's new book everywhere. Including here.




Ok, first question. What did you have for breakfast?

A bowl of oatmeal with milk and honey.

What's the temperature like out there?

Freezing! We've had -15C with brisk east winds for several days—those are our worst and can cause frozen pipes. Not this time, whew.

Now, how did you come up with the idea of Wild Mint Tea? Did you know it would happen while you were writing Raspberries and Vinegar?

If you're talking about the titles of the books, both were written and underwent a title change when they were contracted last spring, so neither the concept of raspberry vinegar nor mint tea was present in the first drafts. If you're talking about what would happen to Claire, yes, I had a good idea as she was a strong secondary character in Raspberries and Vinegar. Just as I have most of the story in mind for the third book in the series.

How long did it take you to write 'Wild Mint Tea'?

I wrote Wild Mint Tea (working title Check Mate) in about 3 months several years ago when it looked likely that the series would be picked up by one of the larger publishing houses. They passed (three times over the course of a year!), but I was glad I had the first draft done when the contract from CNP came my way last spring.

Where there any parts, while writing, that you got stuck on? Where you just hit a roadblock and didn't know what would happen next?

It's been several years, but I remember the writing of this book as sheer bliss, the only time that's happened to me. I don't remember getting stuck. For once.

Who is your favourite character out of the two books?

That's like asking which is my fave granddaughter (frown). But I really do love Noel Kenzie, the hero of Wild Mint Tea, a lot. He's got moxie. Can a guy have moxie? If so, he's got it.

Oh yeah. A man can have moxie. So, which character is you?

The "me" character isn't in this novel. She was in the first one as the mother of the hero and will play a smaller role in the third one as an interested party.

I know you say that you are not in this book, but...I think you are. In the main character, Claire...what are your similarities and differences?
Hmm, I never thought of Claire being like me. We both like food, but she's a trained chef and I've never desired to be. I'm a homebody, but she is way more than I am. I like to keep things organized, but she is ten times more OCD than I am. Personality wise, though, you might be right. Huh. Never thought of it before...

How did you come up with Noel? He is a dreamboat!

First, Claire. Because I had three young women in the series, they needed quite different personalities or it wouldn't be any fun. Claire drew the short straw for being more level-headed and melancholic than the other two. Then I needed a hero who was her polar opposite! Which is how I came up with Noel. Of course, I didn't want him to be irresponsible, so I made sure his career goals were very different from hers.

How do you decide what your characters will look like? Do you use people you know? Do you think of movie stars? If Noel and Claire were to be compared to movie stars (as in characters in movies so we can imagine), who would you pick?
I actually watch fewer than five movies a year, so I don't pick from movie stars. I go to jupiter.com and browse. If you'd like to see the models I picked for Claire and Noel, they're on my Farm Fresh Romance Pinterest board. I'd be interested to know which movie stars these models remind you of! http://www.pinterest.com/valeriecomer/farm-fresh-romance/

 

A super hard question now. Pick a song to go with your novel.

Ha. Not so hard. Two songs. One is the old hymn "This World is Not My Home" for reasons you'll have to read the book to understand, and the other is the bright happy tune in my book trailer. I dare you to watch this and not grin for all 40 seconds!

Why Farm-Romance?

Why not farm fresh romance? They say to write what you know. I'm all about farming and good fresh locally-grown food. And who can't use a little more romance in their lives?

I completely agree. So. What's next?

I'm turning in my novella for Snowflake Tiara shortly. I'm partnering with the amazing Angela Breidenbach for that pair of stories that releases in September. Then I get to turn my full attention to Sweetened with Honey, the third Farm Fresh Romance novel.

If you had only one book to bring on a holiday, which would it be? Can't be the Bible or anything written before 1940. No Jane Austen. Everyone always picks Austen.

Whew. At the risk of all the Austen-lovers hating on me, I'm perfectly fine having her books out of the picture. But I'd probably spend so long standing by my bookshelf, picking up one book, then choosing another, then putting them both back in favor of a third that the ship would sail without me before I'd decided. So I guess I'll just pack my Kindle, because that solves everything.

Valerie's new book will be published this month! You can find more information on her wonderful new novel, and others at her blog, here.  She is having a paperback giveaway on Goodreads, but only to US addresses (boo!). But ONE LUCKY reader here can win a digital version (winner's choice of mobi or epub file) by commenting below before Monday, March 10.

"Void where prohibited; the odds of winning depend on the number of entrants. Entering the giveaway is considered a confirmation of eligibility on behalf of the enterer in accord with these rules and any pertaining local/federal/international laws."


Photo of Valerie goes here, but for some reason it's not working anymore.


Photo of me goes here, but that's not working either. At least we have a picture of her new novel and the gorgeous artwork done by Valerie's very own daughter!

Jenn Kelly is an author and she is figuring it out. You can find her at www.jennkelly.com