Monday, October 12, 2015

A Season to Dance: The Book That Wrote Me


When I wrote the first line of my first novel in January of 2011, I wanted to get published because I was desperate to feel important.

I finished writing A Season to Dance that fall and hired coach Gloria Kempton via Writer’s Digest to look at the whole thing and tell me if it was any good.

She saw potential in the story of a small-town professional ballerina with big dreams, but explained I needed a clearer quest, more telling details, better scene structure, and better balance between sequels and dramatic scenes. I joined Gloria’s critique group and spent a year rewriting.

During that year, my husband got orders to move the family from Fort Benning, Georgia, to Germany, and he deployed for the sixth time soon after we settled on a lovely mountaintop in Idar-Oberstein.

When I finished rewriting, Gloria said the novel looked good and had everything a novel was supposed to have. But… “Something’s still missing. I don’t know what it is. We’ve covered it all.”

So of course I did what any writer desperate for validation would do. I told my coach that surely nothing was missing and that it was time to query. I hired a service to blast queries everywhere for me. I know… Shame on me… But God used that.

God’s Plan—Phase One



One query ended up with Mrs. Joyce Hart, of Hartline Literary. The novel wasn’t Christian—I wasn’t a Christian. She shouldn’t have received my query. But she did. She sent me a note saying she liked the storyline but that in Christian novels the protagonist couldn’t live with her love interest without being married. She was very kind and said that if she was missing the point and if the novel was indeed Christian that I should resubmit explaining the living together piece.

When I read it I laughed and rolled my eyes. I started typing a condescending reply. Something about Christian fairy tale brains and me living in the real world, but I decided not to send it.

Days passed. A week passed. A month passed. And all I did was collect rejections. I became bitter. Bitterly sad at first. Then bitterly discouraged. And then bitterly ugly. I’d never been ugly before. Not like that.

See, up to that point, I’d believed that there was some kind of “god” and that somewhere, somehow, being good was right and that it paid off. But with the disappointments of the publishing journey those beliefs became a joke to me. I stood in the middle of my empty German kitchen—husband deployed, kids at school, my first dog had just died. And I looked at that inbox full of rejections and stated to whomever or whatever was out there: “God is dead.”

Mercy. Surely I said that to the “god” of my imagination, and not to the real God—God as He reveals Himself in the Bible. But I know that He was in that kitchen with me. And phase two of His plan was about to start.

Luke 22:31-32: “And the Lord said, Simon, Simon, behold, Satan hath desired to have you, that he may sift you as wheat: But I have prayed for thee, that thy faith fail not: and when thou art converted, strengthen thy brethren.”

God’s Plan—Phase Two



As I lost all restraint and became the worst version of myself, God removed me from my green German mountaintop. 

After less than eighteen months in Germany, we were sent back to America, to the Chihuahuan Desert in West Texas. To a place called Fort Bliss—a place from which you can see a Mexican mountain with the words: “Cd. Juárez. La Biblia es la verdad. Leela.” That translates to “City of Juárez. The Bible is the truth. Read it.” Gotta love it. God is good.

During the first six months back in America, I went to two secular writers’ conferences and met more rejection. My lack of restraint and my selfishness didn’t really make me happy. I wanted to go to therapy. I wanted a job. I still dreamed of that book deal that had to be just around the corner. I wanted, I wanted…

But nothing happened, and it didn’t matter how hard I tried to get help, get happy, and find any kind of relief for the pain I felt. Nothing. Happened. I’d never seen so many closed doors—slammed-shut doors—ever in my life. Even the shrink kept double booking, closing early, and somehow cancelling on me. It was ridiculous.

The One Open Door



When God planted our family in the desert, He planted us two blocks from a friend from the Fort Benning years. A friend whose claim to fame was church shopping whenever the Army moved her family. I asked her to take me to church on the first Wednesday of January of 2013. 

I fell in His arms. Surrendered, defeated, and dependent. Or what God likes to call—ready. I was born again two weeks later and was baptized on Super Bowl Sunday that February.

Gloria’s “Something Missing”

I had tickets to go to New York for the Writer’s Digest conference that spring, but sometime in March, it dawned on me: “You silly goose of a girl. You wrote a salvation story without the salvation piece.” My first coach, Gloria Kempton, had been right all along. There was something missing!

A Season to Dance isn’t just the story of a small-town professional ballerina who dreams of dancing at the Met in New York and the two men who love her. It’s also the story of a girl desperately trying to fill the God-shaped hole in her heart with often misguided career and romantic pursuits.

I deleted Mrs. Hart’s email that week. Yes, it was still in my inbox. Job well done, Mrs. Hart.

Now, I had work to do. I spent 2013 and the first half of 2014 rewriting the novel. Five ladies from my Sunday school read chapter after chapter as I produced them and cheered me on through that gruesome process. I couldn’t have done it without their support. God is good.

Jeff Gerke edited my novel in the summer of 2014 and had me read Robert McGee’s The Search for Significance: Seeing Your True Worth Through God's Eyes. God is good.

I went to my first Christian writers conference, the ACFW 2014 in St. Louis. Two weeks later, Les Stobbe offered to represent me. God is good.

ACFW 2015 was fantastic and many houses are looking at that first manuscript. God is good.

My family got saved, too. My husband in July of 2013. Our son in December of 2013. My mom in the fall of 2014. And our little girl just this past summer, the summer of 2015. God is amazingly good.

How about you? How has God used your writing to grow you?

Patricia is from Brazil and immigrated to America in 1992. She graduated magna cum laude from the University of Cincinnati in 1998 with a B.A. in English Literature. She's been stationed in Germany twice, first as a public affairs officer for the U.S. Army and later as an Army wife. She and her husband live in El Paso, Texas, with their two children.

Facebook - www.facebook.com/patricia.beal.author
Twitter - www.twitter.com/bealpat
Web - www.patriciabeal.com

22 comments:

  1. Thanks for sharing your story, Patricia! It is both encouraging and inspiring.

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    1. Thanks, Sara. When I fear I'm going the wrong way, I try to remember that God worked everything out beautifully and without my help in this situation. I want to be on board with His plans of course, but if I miss the mark here an there, He will still get His way. It's good to rest on that.

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  2. Patricia, hi. What a fantastic story. And I'm sure the novel is as well.

    God is good. Put a smile on my face. He's so delightful in how He works.

    Thanks so much for sharing your story with us all. Wonderful you've got Les in your corner as well.

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    1. Thanks, Ian. God is too good. Delightful in how He works indeed. Les must have had one of his God moments when he decided to give me a chance because the St. Louis pitch was not strong at all. He didn't think the story would work for the market at the time, and he didn't like my word count. But two weeks later he offered to represent me. I've since addressed the weaknesses he identified, wrote another manuscript, and here we are--in the race. I needed a yes so badly at that point. God knew that, too.

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  3. Hi Patricia, Welcome to ICFW :) Thanks for sharing the ups and downs of your inspiring writing journey with us.

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    1. Hi, Narelle! Thank you. I'm so thrilled to be part of this group. I look forward to getting to know everybody as we journey :)

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  4. Quite a journey, Patricia. I'm glad God finally got your attention!

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    1. Me, too, Alice. I was in a dark place. But I don't live there anymore. Praise God.

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  5. I wrote my first novel because I needed a diversion. I wasn't an English major but the words flowed out of me like warm butter melting on a stack of hotcakes. It was a biography non-fiction but I had to call it fiction because I had to make up so much in-between. After lots of editing, I self-published the book with Publish America (Star America now but I don't suggest them) for free and sold around a hundred books to friends and relatives. My second novel is finished but waiting in the corridors for the right moment to publish with Amazon's Create Space. At my age I can't go through all that rejection like you did nor travel everywhere to promote my book when a traditional publisher says, "jump!" and I can hardly walk! I am blogging and twittering to build my readers one person at a time before I ever try to sell a book again. Meanwhile,while writing my memoirs' blog I have been having a spiritual re-awakening with the LORD! I didn't know until writing my memoirs how much Jesus had been cheering me on from the not so nice nasty corners of my life. I have several writing projects going & just listening to Jesus to guide me along as to what to do each day. I hope to make the memoirs a book and if it doesn't sell I truly got my money's worth from the Jesus revival experience!

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    1. Hi, Kathy! I remember you from my Facebook author page. Nice to see you here. I'm happy to hear things are very vibrant in your walk with the Lord. Keep an open mind and an open heart always. Who knows what God will do with your writing?

      Blessings,

      Patricia

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  6. Your story made me cry, sweet Patricia. So thankful we are now sisters in Christ!

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    1. Hi, Linda! Great to see you here. So true :)

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  7. What a lovely testimony.
    Thanks for sharing.
    Good luck and God's blessings
    PamT

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    1. Hi, Pam! Thank you for stopping by and for the kind words. This book will come out in May of 2017 (Bling! / Lighthouse Publishing of the Carolinas), and I can't wait to see what God will do with it :)

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  8. What an encouragement your words are to me. I'm writing my little heart out. So funny how we think we know God's plans! He must get quite a chuckle! Waiting on God. Not an easy thing to do. Not sure how to even pray anymore. I'm really good at the "Please God, help me win this contest or that one..." It clearly is not about winning! It's about the journey and what God wants to teach me if I will only be still. I'm learning. Slowly. But, I'm starting to get it! Congratulations! How great is our God.

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    1. Thanks, Gail! Write your heart out with Him. It will all work out. Were you at ACFW 2016 in Nashville? Allen Arnold taught a great class on doing life and writing with God and presence over performance. The class was based on his book "The Story of With." I recommend. As for prayer, my pastor preached a sermon this summer that changed my prayer life. I'm Baptist. If you're Baptist or open to listening to a Baptist sermon, try it out. Use the link and scroll down to "Sunday July 17 - 10:30 - Jesus' Prayer for Glorification." - http://www.hillcrestbaptist.cc/recent-sermons-video.html :)

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    1. We serve a WOW God indeed! Nice to see you here :)

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  10. God is good! Thrilled to read your testimony!

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    1. Thanks, Janet! I pray I can continue to share this story in this debut year :)

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  11. I love it!!! I love learning the background story behind "the story". I can't wait for it to release! I'm pre-ordering it tonight. I'm super excited!!!

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    1. Thanks, Kim! So happy you're part of this journey :)

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